Happiness This Way

Delays and Chinese

I thought I would break things obsolete business for a while now and share with you a recent angry mail I received.

Dear Evil Genius

I have been following your blog for a while, but I would let them know that I will not go back to your site, and be telling everyone who does not know to visit. I would like to know why.

I feel deeply offended by the casual use of the word "retard" in their publications, especially in their video segments. As a mother of a child with disabilities mental, you have no idea of how hate speech, even spoken in jest, can make someone feel. My son has enough challenges that await him in his life. He do not need people like you intolerant to mock his disability.

Susan (name changed)

So that Susan, and all other persons who may have offended. Eat.

Here is my reasoning:

I will not enter the argument that it was just a fun word to say and has no crime. I also call things "gay" all the time. It could mean something sucked, was lame, was unexpected, or just weird. However, I have absolutely zero problems with someone who is gay. I'm all for gay marriage, for their picket equality rights with them (but never in front of them … lol), and probably more revealing, I have no problem with thinking something I myself am gay – and has been more than once. I'll admit it. I have a man in love with Christian Bale. I do not want to kiss, but I have to see everything that is in. Weird. But I'm okay with that.

So why am I telling Susan to take a flying leap?

Because the offense and not his son … that really is retarded. She is offended for someone else. Do we really need that? I would never say that his son is a retard. But I would say it is. And here's why:

If I said anything derogatory towards fat people, I would offend you directly. If I started in the old confined cat lovers, I would offend you directly. If I called out all the HSN-addicted, Beanie Baby collection Memorabilia misfits, spoken to you directly. With this in mind:

Does your child be offended if I said those things to you? No. Because he is retarded.

Is your child offended because I said something retarded? No. Because he is retarded.

The What I'm getting is that your child does not feel offended. You are. Do you think it should be protected because they have a doctor "detriment." But he does not care, so you're really protected?

Leave I extend my point of view with a story of my childhood:

When I was in elementary and secondary school, I volunteered for a program that even "regular" students with "special needs" students. My colleague and friend David was possible. It was several years older than me and was quite severe mental disabilities. This was long before parents started thinking about the safety of your child's skull, able or not, but if it were today, would have been defiantly wearing a helmet more of the time.

I spent part of two days a week with David in the course of a few years. At first it was only during our sessions school, but eventually started going out more and more outside of school. As you can imagine, the school children at their worst, I heard David called on possible name in the book. Really bothered me that people could be so cruel.

After all these years, I think what really bothered me was the fact that people saw me as being associated with a delay. David does not get what they were saying. He did not care. And the lever is lost moments of happiness because of it. I did.

Over time, I had the opportunity to dine at his house a few times. He was the youngest of three, with a "regular" brother and sister. What struck me was that no one at home what treated as something more than a typical child. I had to do his homework, got the love and praise when he did well, and reprimanded when they did wrong. The boy who everyone in the school (and I) saw as retarded, was just another child from pain in the ass when I was at home. That experience changed the way he looked at David.

Now for the important part.

Seeing his bedroom at home for the first time also made me see in a whole new light. What I discovered was that it was an amazing artist. Not good for a "special" guy – exceptional for anyone. I've never seen his work at school, because 1. No time to do so and 2. He had no innate need to show how the rest of us. I can only guess that in his mind, his drawings made him happy, and what was the point of showing them to others?

On the walls, where floor and in piles on the table were hundreds if not thousands of drawings of dragons, cartoon characters, buildings and school hallways, and people related with the day to day … including me. And I'm not talking about quick sketches, but carefully drawn up to detail the exact number of books on a shelf in the library.

Since that day, just became my friend David. The children in school is still as bad as ever about the call name (this is also around the time that I became who I am today acids), but it never affected me much the way it did. I realized that David does not really matter to me, and I do not care if the kids saw me as associated with "the" delay, because many respects was more exceptional than it ever would be.

That's the same exact reason I have no problem going to a gay club (with or without me wife) or inappropriate jokes when I'm with black or (God forbid) Jewish friends (.. and yes most of them are lawyers or dentists). I have accepted as my As for what I care at all if you think less of me for your company or brand me as one of "them" to keep it.

So at closing,

I'm pretty sure that no people are reading this retarded blog. I can not confirm that directly, but I'm pretty sure it would be over the appointment of its toes eleven who read what I have to say about the marketing … Just kidding, my guess is they are doing something incredible good under the nose that are not known. I am not a religious one, but I think for all that God (or Allah, or Vishnu, or Buddha, or whatever) go away, returns to somehow.

If I have offended, I'm sorry to do that for you, but I stand by my statement. Eat Me. Your child does not need your sympathy. He did not need you to feel sorry for him. And certainly makes you need to feel offended by it. After all, he himself is not offended.

Treat him like a normal child. Encourage what makes him happy and protect what makes him sad … I can guarantee are not the same things that make you sad.

If you are not visiting the blog again, that's their decision. But if your child ever want to come visit is welcome with open arms. Even if you are a retard.

This is how I feel. I'd love to hear what others have to think. I promise I'll leave a comment with vehemence, even if they disagree with me and think I'm an asshole:)

PS: Saw this video the other day and the thought of David again. I hope you are well. I have stayed home a looong time. Maybe I'll look next time I'm in town.

href = "http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a8YXZTlwTAU 20%"> http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a8YXZTlwTAU Stephen Wiltshire. Amazing.

PS II: Only the title makes sense, I hate the Chinese. Not all of them, but certainly those living in Villa Grad with me at the University of Rhode Island when I was my MBA. I'll explain at some point.

PS III: The games division of my company created a game a while ago called "Who Rode the short bus" with, you guessed, a host with mental health problems. It's fun and funny, but I'm sure it would offend some, too. Well, you can not please everyone. If you can play for free here.

About the Author

Evil Genius TV is the small business coaching and strategy arm of Evil Genius Interactive, a web and marketing development firm located in Gainesville,FL.
http://www.evilgeniustv.com
http://www.evilgeniusinteractive.com

Dalai Lama: Peace means Happiness